Boring Postings

+SPICE

Mr Funny CherkyB observed that he can write a Perl script to generate my blog postings by randomizing/combining the following elements:

• randomize RyanC wake-up time
  
• randomize daily grape feeding time
  
• randomize basic food groups for grilling
  
• randomize pics of food grilled
  
• randomize books read
  

It was pretty obvious and I couldn't even pretend that I have something profound or funny to post - afterall, I am NOT that funny and I'm sure ya all figured that out. In fact, my recollection of the only times coworkers laugh at my comments is when I get pissed off -- either because they don't see me pissed off too often (but then some say I need to be respectful to those that won't do simple work in my opinion) or because they were laughing at me. So, I must apologize to my disappointed readers that may have expected "entertaining" or "readable" postings.

Here is what my slow wit said to myself when I thought about the script posting idea: "If I could control daily routines, then I'd be able to eliminate the random parts and my postings will say 'see previous day'! That would be a simpler script to write!" I forgot to let the master blogger know that his Perl script will probably post more interesting stories than mine -- but he should know that already. Despite my limitations, I will keep his helpful encouragement in mind about spicing up this blog before losing all my readers. Hmm.. I think he meant to make funny insight or improve on my delivery -- though I did think maybe he might have wanted to hear about the spices we use for grilling, which would be cayen pepper for burgers.

+ SPICE^2

I can't think of anything funny to write about! Maybe instead of focusing on listening and eating during lunch/dinner, I need to start practicing my story-telling techniques. Another slightly more attractive alternative is to wait for RyanC to grow up and have him post here since he is definitely a lot funnier than me - especially since that little boy is the one that gets all the women to laugh and smile when we go out.

+ SPICE

Okay... so back to regular postings with (hopefully) less predictable content:

Yesterday I saw a road-kill. It looked like a rabbit but I couldn't be sure since I was focusing on not running over the already-dead animal with wheels. With the master's words lingering in my head "find and write about the funny stuff in regular life" (or something like that), I thought: "I wonder how this can be funny?" That funny thought quickly turned into another type of curiousity: "I wonder who takes care of the road kills? how come they just seem to magically disappear on the road after a few days? do coyotes eat them?"

I was too tired last night so I fell asleep without following up on the road-kill idea, only to wake up at 1am finding myself alone on the sofa downstairs. Alone and hungry, I figured it was better if I slept instead of looking into road kills...

So, after eating dinner and digesting most of it, I did some googling tonight and found this article describing someone that gets paid to remove road kills.

He's paid $40 per deer. The Pennsylvania Department of Transportation says Brannon averages about 1,800 of them a year. That's $72,000 annually."

Whoa! That's not bad even though the guy has to pay some expenses out of pocket. Maybe I do have a backup plan in case I lose my job or I can do this on the side! Though I also wondered if this guy's family would drive around running over animals to increase his take home pay. That'd be like having internet ads to generate revenue and then clicking on them! Hmm.. maybe this road-kill contract job isn't for me.

I will need to find another way to pay for the new gadget purchased tonight...

BIG NEWS! I finally caught Dell with non-expired deal on the Digital Rebel XT dSLR camera and placed an order. They didn't have black colored camera on sale so I had to get silver instead, which isn't my top choice but figured I can always re-order if the black one goes on sale. It was a tradeoff between getting it quickly from another on-line vendor or save $30 (3 buckets of KFC!!!) and wait 6+ weeks for delivery from Dell. Now, 6+ weeks may seem like a lot of time to some folks but not to a married guy that stayed home for 6+ weeks during sabbatical. This delivery estimate is also the estimate for when my lens (ordered a few days earlier) will arrive. Maybe the grilled food postings will look better then!

PS. Had grilled corn tonight with Yoshida sauce. It was just okay. I'd like to try garlic butter grilled corn next time...

+ SPICE + SPICE + SPICE...